New Video

**Okay I have moved the video to the top for now...just to showcase it a bit more. **

Okay I have posted a new video at the bottom of the blog....in tribute to my wonderful loving hubby who is right now flying above the world somewhere on his way home. Well close to home anyway! He will be at his demob site for a few days...and says that because it's my fault that I'm going to Washington instead of visiting him there he has to stay at one of the single guy's beachfront house on his 4 day leave....oh I bet twisting that arm hurts doesn't it honey? He's planning on getting another tattoo while he is there...Something to do with the Seabee's but he hasn't decided yet...I told him he deserved it....I deserve another one too but it took too long to decide on the one I got on my lower back I would hate to see how long it takes to figure out the next one!

I made this video as a tribute to him....when I get back from my trip on Sunday I will post the other one that I made for him of pictures of us. A few of the pictures on this video are from Desert Storm and you can tell because the quality is not as good! He is my American Soldier and the love of my life! 14 months has been a long time but then again it's just like yesterday that he left....I can't wait till he gets back home in a couple weeks....

Angry Angel

That is what I am today! A spitting mad angry angel! I'm so furious and sick to my stomach to live where I do! I've held my tongue for quite awhile but NO LONGER WILL I STAND BY AND KEEP QUIET!! I am so embarrassed to be a citizen of this city that I could rent a Uhaul today and leave. THIS started it over a month ago.....and THIS ended it for me this weekend. This is our MAYOR who uses GOVERNMENT EMAIL to send out a cry for protests! An ELECTED OFFICIAL who chooses to make his views not only known but publicily denounce our government and support anti war protestors. The first time was just sad considering that the VFW National convention was going on and he actually made a SPEECH at it after leaving the protest site. With so much of our local National Guard gone and Hill AFB just a short drive away he might as well have spit on the families that are left behind. I guarantee that when I get back I will send off the letters to the editorial pages and begin to visit the protest sites here locally to voice my own opinion. I myself feel that he should relieved of his duties after publicily embarrassing us the first time with the National Media reporting on the fact that OUR PRESIDENT was here and OUR MAYOR called for a protest. Not only did he visit the protest but he ORGANIZED it! Sickens me! Rocky Anderson I have one thing to say to you...Hit the Road Rocky!

Something Interesting To Say

Okay I haven't been on for a bit...trying to come up with something interesting, intellectual, fascinating or some other great word to say....Haven't had much luck!

Thought our pay problem was fixed...it is not. They issued us a check for $1300 which isn't even the amount that they took from us last month! So we are still working on that. Good news though....

Hubby might be back in the country within a week! Wish I could go and see him, he is going to travel to the same place he left out of but he will be flying in the day before I fly to Washington DC but luckily he will be doing the demob process till at least after i get back home. I was afraid he might be the one coming to get ME at the airport! This would be 2 weeks earlier than he thought....which is great. I have odd feelings about this but may decide to explain later on...for now i'm still sorting through my mind. As you can see still not thinking of anything that is interesting to say!

Had surgery. All went well...it was scheduled for 10:30 am they told me to be there at 9:30 am. FINALLY around 11 am they come in and give me an IV after I have been undressed wearing a "shower cap" and a hospital gown for 1 1/2 and say "Did the nurse tell you she made a mistake when she scheduled the surgeries?" Umm no...what's that mean? "Well right now there are still 2 people in front of you and they have surgeries lasting 1 1/2 hours....She accidently only gave 30 minutes for each surgery rather than 1 1/2 hours." Okay great news (insert sarcastic rolling of eyes here)...not good when they ask if you would like a book and they bring you a NOVEL...I said no I want some onion rings I haven't eaten for 14 hours! LOL Finally went in at 2, in recovery at 3:30 and out of the hospital on my way home by 4:30. Got my prescriptions, heating pad, some KFC (rootbeer float and a biscuit after 19 hours of not eating is good for the soul! ) and was headed home to sleep!

Woman next to me in recovery was a bit mentally handicapped....so when she woke up she was crying and screaming for her "mommy and chicken soup" (She looked to be about 40) . I asked the nurse if I said anything crazy or embarrassing when I woke up..she said no I was fine. Very groggy barely out of the anesthia and the DR comes by and asks if I have any questions...I carefully remove my oxygen mask and say "Yes when can I have sex again?" LOL Told hubby he probably thinks i'm some nympho or something...Hubby said in a very calm voice..."Well that is a very good question to ask honey I'm happy that you thought of it...now how long did he say? Cause I will be home soon!" <---pervert! LOL I know that 14 months in the sand will do that to you...okay I lie he was like that before! It's only gotten progressively worse!

One Less Stressor

Yay! The important people have helped us with our pay problem...according to EQCM we will be getting a supplement check with the amount that they so quickly and WRONGLY took out of my hubby's checks over the last two months....we will know by Friday when and how much exactly but if i've done my calculations correctly it should be about $2700 dollars! Finally I can pay ALL the bills now and breathe a sigh of relief! So things are looking up...Hubby sent me this picture and I thought it was really neat looking with the sunset behind him.....He has no idea when it was taken or by who but he got it and thought he would share...He's dirty, sandy, sunburnt and silly but he's mine! He's the one with the radio and pistol.

Quarter Life Crisis

I'm going through a 1/4 life crisis...have been for probably 8 months or so...I had all these dreams when I was little about what I was going to do when I grew up...well actually ONE dream I was going to be a lawyer, since the time I was 4 my mom said and it never waivered...Well I got pregnant in high school, graduated and started college--Pre law with a double minor in speech communications and ecology. I was going to save the world! Be an environmental lawyer...I love it...I was a champion debater in high school (Yes i have trophies to prove it LOL ) But I had to make a choice a year later....stay in an abusive relationship or run as fast as I could and quit school to take care of my daughter and I. I chose our life and happiness and put my dream on the back burner.

I always thought I would get back to it...then months turned into years...and soon I had a 6 year old who needed clothes and food and so I looked at her and knew that I couldn't put her life on hold to follow my dream...I had to get a job that paid well and keep plugging along at life. Soon I was looking at my dream--realizing that I was soon to be VERY OLD (okay 27 LOL) and so I began to add up the time for a bachelor's degree, law school, being a nobody at a law firm and finally making money at what...40 plus?!? For those in those age ranges I mean no offense...But it is an awfully long time to be poor and then finally make money when it's almost time to retire!

So everything else has just been a space filler...something to give me a paycheck but it's not what is in my heart! I have had dreams....being a nurse, a realtor, truck driver (LOL Still going to do that but that's okay !), Insurance Estimator (did that for years) Horse Trainer (Okay seriously that is a dream LOL) but nothing that compares to my dream of being a lawyer. I LOVE college. I really do...everything about it! I was my most happiest in life while in school... So I think I decided what to do when I grow up (yay only 28 going on 29 now!)

Tommarrow I am sending requests for my transcripts and see where I stand...hell it's been too long I blocked it all out of my memory on what classes I have taken for sure LOL Then I am going to compare it to a list of general education and other requirements for a couple schools that I have chosen...Then buy a book for CLEP exams. I know I can test out of some...I have done entirely too well in school and on my ACT's that I took so many lonnnnnggggg years ago not to...And i've only become more educated as life has thrown me into so many different careers. And concentrate on doing that and then put in an application. Maybe a few online courses in the next year...Will need to save up some money before I can do that and hubby needs to finish getting his Associates degree otherwise he won't make Chief when he is eligible here soon and that is important and on more of a timeline...

But that is what I'm going to do...I've been successful in every job I've ever had...promotions have always come to me based on merit because i'm just that over achiever type of person. Will being a lawyer still be what is in my heart in a few years? Possibly...but there is time I have decided...lots and lots of time...I'm not that old...and I have a husband that supports me in whatever I do. So we shall see!

I got things to do honestly why am I here?

Okay seriously I need to stay off the computer and stop reading blogs and start writing my speech for Saturday! I have to give a briefing on pre Mobilization family rediness to the entire Reserve Center. I'm not worried about public speaking or anything...but nobody has given me a guideline on what to talk about...So I had a long talk with the Commander today (about a lot of things) and he and I talked about a couple things. But i'm thinking i'm going to be wingin it !

Tommarrow I am calling the Air Force clinic near here. They really upset me on Friday and for the past 2 weeks. Not going to get into it but it's just their being inconsiderate. If you aren't in the AF then you dont' mean shit to them and they will let you know! I think the real problem with Military Clinics is that the doctor's there don't give a crap....You aren't a customer, they don't need to treat you good or have good service because what does it matter if you don't go there? That they see one less patient but still get paid the same amount of money! You being treated so badly by them and talked to so rudely that you are in tears when you get through or being strung along to get medicine that they themselves have said you need due to the test results that they ordered doesn't make one bit of difference...they will still get check on the 1st and the 15th. Well im' going to be one of many who stand up and say "Your clinic is awful!"

There's nothing that makes them strive for good service, no reward for keeping their patients. So in the meantime you just have to buck it up and go there or else nothing...I mean it is seriously ridiculous! The commander told me to call them and talk to their customer complaint department. I am going to and be very professional and explain to them that given my position as ombudsman for the reserve center how I will have to honestly tell the reserve families when they call me and ask how the service is at Hill that they suck!

Great just one more thing to write down tonight...hmmmmm I do much better under pressure maybe I will wait till Friday night to write my notes for my speech!

Monday

Okay well I didn't post anything yesterday...slept for most of the day but I got that situation worked out hopefully so I will have more energy soon *YAY!*

Hubby is no longer flying into Gulfport he is now going to be headed to Florida. Would like to be able to afford to fly there and spend 4 days hanging out in Florida with him but due to the Navy messing up his pay for the past 6 weeks I doubt we will have the money for that. Although we are working on it and have made it quite an issue so now we got the "big ones" involved. Next step is Congressman ! Although I mentioned that (people jump when you say that LOL) but I am trying to follow the chain and get it squared away within the military system. So hope to see something happen in the next couple of days.

Wanted to buy him one of those tshirts and send it to him so he could wear it home..."Happiness is Iraq in my rearview mirror" but that will only happen if we get money in the next couple of days otherwise it won't make it in time.

391 days...seems like forever and yet seems like yesterday at the same time he's been gone. 3.28 weeks according to his countdown clock last night. I have been here before....told him we got down to 2.23 weeks last time and started back at 6 months! He said "Nope definately coming home this time you can count on it!" Well not much to say for now will visit again later tonight.

9/11 Recruit Story aka Our Love Story

I read an article on CNN the other day about people enlisting after 9/11 and began to think about my OWN recruitment story. I did not enlist in the armed forces as a member and of course my husband had already served as an Army Combat Engineer and was a member of the Navy Seabees allready. I was enlisted as a military spouse. This is our love story told from my perspective, I don't know what was in his mind because if you knew my hubby then you would know he's not as open as you would hope....but something happened during that time which in a way changed everything and maybe one day he will tell me his side of the story...

I remember where I was when it happened, right out of O.W's War of the worlds...I had dropped off my daughter and just gotten in the car and turned on the radio and it was 7:30 local time and I was on my way to work. I don't need to tell you there was no work to be done that day...nobody called...nobody came in. The ones that did, stayed and watched the TV my boss had ran home to get rather than asked about their cars. It didn't seem important anymore. Day turned into night and it still didn't seem real....my husband and I talked about things and it wasn't long before he got the phone call I remember picking up the phone and they said "This is XXX from the Reserve Center is Petty Officer XXX there?"....Make sure your bag is packed and you can be reached at all times, you've been put on alert.

The phone calls started from family and friends because they all wanted to know if he would be called up....and of course my husband being the calm person he is told people "Stop f*^%ing asking me I will know when i'm headed out if something is going on! Until I have orders to go I'm not going!" I must admit I was one of those people but he likes to sleep with me so he didn't get that mean with me! Let me give you a bit of background....

We met in the fall of 1997. Wow seems like a long time when I say it like that! I was 20 (course he thought I was 21 but that is another story!) and he was just out of the Army. We began dating and for years ahead we faced challenges that almost broke our spirit in each other. We broke up, dated other people but always came back to each other realizing that we were meant to be. But he was always insistant he would NEVER get married again (after 2 marriages he was done...a high school sweetheart who left him while in Korea for 2 years and an awful woman who tried to take his spirit as well as his son) I accepted the fact that for NOW I would be a girlfriend....didn't mean I didn't love him or he didn't love me but that was what it was going to be. We lived our life like we were married the committment was there but I had told him that one day it wouldn't be enough for me...one day I would wake up and realize I was some 40 year old girlfriend and want more. But we went on until 2001 that way. He went to drill weekend that first time a week afterwards....and he came home.

I remember he was sitting on the couch and I was in the kitchen and asked him

"Did they tell you anything at drill? Are you going anywhere?" I was met with silence....so I said "Honey!" (little louder this time) and asked again...silence....So i decided it was time for me to come out of the kitchen and he was sitting there still...So I asked again (can't say i'm not persistant) and looking straight ahead still wearing his uniform with a look on his face I hadn't seen before he said...

"What would you do?"

"What do you mean what would I do?"

"What would you do!" (looking at me now as I stand there holding the dishtowel)

"Once again what do you mean what would I do?"

"What the f*ck would you do if I was called away for a year or longer?!?" (so now i get a little angry that he is yelling and me and how dare he ask me such a stupid question!)

"I wouldn't do ANYTHING!" ( I have no idea exactly what he is talking about... I mean what kind of question is "What would you do?" but I figured that answer is the best I can come up with right now)

" You would do something...you would leave...you'd go back to Wyoming with your mother!! You wouldn't stay because we're not married and there is no reason for you to stay!!" (oh no he did not just say that! And yelling at me to boot?)

"You are right I would do something! (now i'm pissy) I would do something...you wanna know what?!? (shaking the dishtowel at him) I would get up in the morning, get my daughter ready for school, take her to daycare, go to work, pick her up from daycare, come home, make dinner, give her a bath, go to bed, and then you know what I would do the next day? (hands on my hips) I would wake up, get her ready for school, take her to daycare...Do you see where i'm going with this? HOW DARE YOU! say that I would just take off and that there is NO COMMITTMENT here just because we aren't married...I moved here for YOU! I have a job here, a house, a life here because YOU are here. You are the one saying that "it's just a piece of paper that we are committed" I made a committment long ago to you and if there is no such committment on your side then yeah I might as well leave if that's what you are saying to me"

He left the room ...

A week later he wanted to go with me to the mall (mind you christmas shopping season was begining and he HATES the mall...I'm not sure he has even been but maybe once or twice since then) to get something for my cell phone and he said he wanted to walk around a bit we finally made our way back to where we started to the jewelry store (next to the cell phone place). And he walked up the wedding ring section (You know the salespeople pounce on you when you walk over there) and he said "I like that one...You know you are picking out your christmas present dont' you?" I told him "Yeah but you know you still have to ask me don't you?"

So that is our love story...and my 9/11 recruitment story as a military spouse...It wasn't a sense of patriotism or pride that made this happen because of 9/11....maybe it was his fear of losing something he cared about BECAUSE of his patriotism and pride and love for his country...he knew at some point he would go. He volunteered to go back then and everyday since then. I tease him that he just wanted to make sure I could use the commissary when he was gone if he went...But I wonder if he feared me leaving or if it was in that moment that he realized that I really did love him and he actually realized that he loved me that it wasn't just something for the now but something something for the future.

He left over a year ago...and I have been through a lot here at home because he's not here but knowing that he loves me and his letters telling me that it would be hell over there knowing that if I wasn't at home for him writing him letters, sending him packages and supporting him in everything that he does makes me happy to have been recruited as a military spouse and never having a bit of regret that I signed the dotted line and I will re-up as long as we live.

I need a remote control

Okay I forget yesterday as I was stuck on the couch with a heating pad on my neck (don't ask) I figured out I needed a remote control. I couldnt' move because it hurt when I did so I laid there for 2 hours watching UPN (some backwards fox channel as far as I can tell) and I watched commercials for Dermo Max some manly creme-funny commercial not like ha ha funny but really odd funny like I didn't think someone actually paid for a producer to make it. And then watched this show Cheaters seriously like some America's most wanted type show with low deep voices of the announcers, surveillance cameras taken by their "elite private investagators" and people having sex in cars in parking lots and even one guy who got out of the car naked with a shirt on his front to throw out a drink in the trash can a good 40 feet away from the car he was being taped in having sex with someone who WASN'T his girlfriend. Seriously who does that? He even took a big drink before he tossed it in the trash...Anyway it's a comical show to watch..sad but comical at the same time...But i really need to get a remote control!

Today's Thoughts

Today is an odd day for me....

Smelled cut grass all day...maybe it's a hint that I should cut mine. Front lawn is long..Back lawn is a jungle but the cat and dog have fun in it.

Got my last shot before the surgery on the 20th. My butt hurts and they were freaking out about the account balance because Tricare hasn't paid. Convinced them not to worry.

Took a nap-5 hours. Great now i'm up all night.

Watched things today...I mean really watched them. Sat at the backwindow and watched the cat hunting a mouse-she found her prey. Watched people walk down the street. Watched the man across the street nailing shingles to a roof and can hear the sound of his nail gun tapping through the noise.

Picked up garbage around the house and cleaned out the fridge-Needed to be done last week but haven't felt like it...

Did nothing all day long and feel like I did nothing-going for a walk later on...today has been an odd day.

My Newest Engineer

Okay I came across a blog that was talking about adopting a group of 500 Combat Engineers to be adopted. This is being ran by a wonderful woman named PJ ( to email her click here) Please visit the and keep up with the wonderful efforts of this adventure adopting out the 150th Engineer Battalion. She is still short on her goal of having everyone of them adopted but definately on her way! I of course adoped one and have sent my first letter out to him and waiting on dearly beloved DFAS to get their head straight so I can send a package! Sorry even my adopted "boys" don't get a package if my hubby doesn't and until then I don't have the funds to get them anything!

I will keep updated on what goes on with my newest adoption. I have other soldiers and veterans adopted through the Angel's N Camouflage organization that I have been a part of for quite awhile. I have linked both of these under my links section. I encourage you to play a part in making sure that the soldiers/sailors/marines know they are thought of back home. If it's just a postcard or a thank you. Please show your support and send SOMETHING to our deployed and wounded letting them know we are behind them 100% and their families as they are away from their families or recovering.

Engineers are very close to my heart as my husband was in the Army as a Combat Engineer for 8 years prior to his enlistment in the Seabees. 2nd, 5th, and 10th Engineer Battalions for him! When he went to Desert Storm he was in the Army.

United Airlines sucks!

Okay little strong wording but hey it's true! Okay I just came across this article and it just reminded me how much they ticked me off! I had posted before that I was scheduled to fly into NOLA (okay we all know that isn't happening but keep readin) but I had called United because I am actually going to be in Washington DC from September 28th-Oct 2nd and have a flight going out of Baltimore back to Utah. This cost us $381.00 roundtrip from Utah to Baltimore. So I contacted United to see how much more it would cost for me to change my return flight originating from Baltimore to New Orleans but flying out of New Orleans on the 10th of October instead....the woman on the phone said it would take her a moment to check it out. So I decided to tell her WHY I was looking to change my flight. I let her know that I had gotten information that my husband would be flying out of Kuwait back home within a couple days of me flying back to Utah and so I figured I would just stay on the east coast and fly back with him or at least around the time he came back and we could take 4 days leave visiting the area since he has been gone for 14 months in IRAQ! SOOOO she came back with an answer for me...it would require almost $700 EXTRA on top of the $381 to change the flight that way....Ummm okay so I'm changing departure cities (which NOLA is actually cheaper to fly in and out of on any carrier including United than Baltimore according to the searches I had done on airfare before scheduling my trip to Washington) and I was going to change it to a later date which normally makes it cheaper...Silly me thought they might want to help me out since I am FINALLY getting my husband back. But according to this article it says that they will offer discounts to military families...hmmmm funny....

Cost of my plane ticket from Utah to NOLA on October 4th returning on October 10th????!!! The suspense is killing you....$241.00 Thank you Delta! Now I know at this point it doesn't make a difference but that article just brought it all back up to the surface...sorry had to go off!

I wrote them an email asking for an explanation as to WHY they would say they are offering a discount to military families/members but not when they have to change an existing flight when we all know how much notice you normally get for sure as to when they are coming home... still waiting to hear for sure whether they will actually take them to Gulport or fly them somewhere else for their debriefing like Port Hueneme. Guarantee though United won't be getting my money!

Contractors

Wow I am beginning to think it's the same NOLA and Iraq....

Intimidation, attacks take toll on contractors in Iraq <-these are the Iraqi contractors being trained by our military to rebuild their own country being killed by their own "citizen" (that term is meant very loosely there) hmmm where have we seen that happen before...citizens needing a strong infrastructure again and yet certain people not allowing that to happen.... You can see my post earlier regarding the attacks on our Army Corp of Engineers the other day there in NOLA....hmmmm odd dont' you think?

Okay i'm done let's get back to Iraq....The cost of security to protect these contractors (wait let's call them....useful citizens for now) is seriously eating into the budget for the reconstruction...now if didn't have to use 5 billion dollars to train and equipt the Iraqi Police (who by the way their own "people" <---insurgents are killing and attacking their families) then we could get a lot more done...but i'm sure it's not right to attack those "poor people" who chose to murder, intimidate and harm the contractors who are only trying to make a free Iraq a better place to live for their own families as well as others....I mean after all we are the monsters right?!?

""He goes to sites, handing out workers a letter saying, 'I know where you
live, and I'll kill you and your family,' " McCoy said. "He's out there kidnapping and killing these people." (speaking of Abu Bakr, who leads a splinter cell of al-Qaeda in Iraq)

I'm sure he's a very nice man on the inside who only wants a peaceful end to all this...and if we weren't there he would not be doing that...Good thing i'm not so jaded and I can think optimistically! (okay i really almost spit my ice cream that time I swear!)

A Confession?

I'm not going to say much about this but hey it's got to be mentioned...I think there were three things to the article that really hit home and made an impression on me...

1. That they think it might be a ploy to simply sway public opinion about whether or not he "commited a crime"? "Is this the fabrication of Talabani or what? Let's not have a trial on TV. Let the court of law, not the media, make its ruling on this," Alani said. Okay seriously since when has the court of law or legal issues ever come into play there for a very long time? Oh wait...everything was decided by law there...just like the elections too bad they were all ran by ONE person!
2. This scares me the most..."The perception that Saddam was being convicted before a trial could add the Sunni anger." This could have dire consequences for our forces over there as the Sunni make up the majority and stronghold within the insurgency...this could spell danger and an uproar amongst the fighting that they are experiencing there...this could definatly be worse than the riots caused by Newsweeks' Koran Scandal earlier this year. I just hope that if this is a ploy it doesn't have an affect on our men and women in uniform (fighting the fight that is just and right)
3. "Saddam's legal team said it plans to challenge the starting date as allowing insufficient time for a proper defense. Defense lawyers also said they would challenge the trial's legitimacy." Now this one just made me laugh outloud and almost spit Banana Split Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream across my monitor...Ummmmm let's see he's been in custody since December 2003....two years?!? Two years isn't enough time...and PLEASE I think questioning the legitimacy is like the pot calling the kettle black dont' you think?

Where are we again?

Okay just wondering where we are again...because i'm sorry does this sound like america? Do we need to send armored personnel with every contractor and relief worker out there? Apparently we need to follow the rules that our military has set forth in Iraq....

NEW ORLEANS - Police shot and killed at least five people Sunday after gunmen opened fire on a group of contractors traveling across a bridge on their way to make repairs, authorities said. -ap

What about our apache's backing up the blackhawks and other aid workers in the sky? Apparently if we are shooting at them we need them!

Besides the lawlessness, civilian deaths and uncertainty about their families, New Orleans' police have had to deal with suicides in their ranks. Two officers took their lives, including the department spokesman, Paul Accardo, who died Saturday, according to Riley. Both shot themselves in the head, he said. Sad.....very very sad...

I only have one question as I watch the coverage and some of the people there...I understand the sick, the old, the children, and even the many people that are so overweight that they can't move by themselves...but I see men and women in their 20's and 30's that are honestly in better shape than myself...WHY DID THEY NOT WALK OUT? I don't care if I had to SWIM out I would have left...shown up at someone's house once I got to a safe place that wasn't affected and said "Please get me some help" why just sit there and WAIT for someone to come and give you food and shelter and water? I just really don't understand and have heard the same echoed from other people....Why did they not just walk out....leave...they had DAYS and DAYS to evacuate...I'm sure that if someone was walking out someone else with a car would have given them a ride...I would have put a backpack on and left by foot, bicycle anything to get out of there! I would have ridden a Hotwheel of my child if I thought it could get me someplace safe. I will never understand it....I guess I haven't gotten to the point when I will sit back and wait for the govt to hand me assistance and rescue.....I would have found it myself.

The evac of the people left there needs to have order...otherwise what do you have when you move a large group of people to a spot to evac them and there is no order in it but you just make a mass exodus? You get the SuperDome or the Convention Center and we saw how well that worked....I'm sorry to see everything that is going on but it has to be an organized effort.

PTSD

With everything that is going on in the world I thought I would bring up this organization...It is a non profit organization founded by a man who suffered due to the Vietnam war and wrote a book about his experiences for his children and has now started this site in hopes to help those affected by events and suffereing from PTSD. It is an organization ran by volunteers that many are PTSD survivors themselves. I think it would be a great place for information, referral and a listening ear for those that need it...

(This is their mission statement)

Mission
The mission of the PTSD Alliance is to support
PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder) survivors by advocating for their rights in the American society; finding assistance for them through public and private resources; and to educate the public on the effects of PTSD on the survivor.

This is something that we will need to deal with for service members and the first responders but also for the people of Katrina that have seen the devastation...My local newsperson said it last night "They didnt' say much on the plane here from NOLA but the empty haunted look in their eyes said it all and will surely be there forever into the future"

Flat Angel

I had some pictures up from Flat Angel's USO Tour but I have since moved them on to the picture page. Please check the Link at the top of the page to navigate there!

A Bitter Pill

I was reading through somethings that I have posted lately...and even chatting on yahoo with "friends" and realized that i've been kinda a b*tch lately! It's a long weekend and everyone keeps asking me "What are you doing this weekend?" Well ummm I guess you are looking at it! I have had a really hard time dealing with things these last few months...like life is just building up on me and I'm not sure how to cope anymore. And this is from someone who according to some is the "perfect military spouse" I'm a confident strong patriotic person who has always made it my goal to support others through their dark times. Now i look around and think Who is supporting me? Where are the people to tell me that I don't have be lonely? That I don't have to handle the pay problems or health problems by myself....I've given so much time to others I forgot about myself. I'm in this huge house by myself with only my dog and cat and my computer. Reaching out to others but having nobody answer the call.

I quit working months ago and I think that in late June that started to wear on me. But then hubby came home on R&R and everything was fine. I'm so used to being independent, working, stressed that this time alone in my house has started to overwhelm me. Especially when the Navy messes up his pay (I pray that it is fixed and we will get the money back on the 15th like they say...I have faith!!)

Daughter is living with my mom and I hate to say it but when I go there and she seems happier than she has been here in Utah it kills me....it causes an ache in my heart I can't even explain. My mom tells me that when i'm not there she threatens her in moving back to Utah with me...( i've been on the other side of that conversation for years...the grass isn't always greener hey Pip's?) But when hubby gets back and returns to the Reserves we are going truckin (I refer to it as our adventure) and hopefully it will work out the way we want and soon we will have our dreams come true...and we can all be together again...

I guess it's just hard to admit that I NEED my husband as much as I do. He's my best friend and my love...but that doesn't mean I didn't have some sort of childish fantasy that without him here I would be fine...I was for awhile...but 14 months drags on and on...He's a Seabee for gods sakes! That's suppose to be 6 mos! Silly me I married the one with a sense of pride and work ethic!

Moving on to another night...guess he isn't coming on tonight. It's a long weekend I think I will sleep in again....

Biloxi Gulfport Area

While most people have been so concerned about what has been going on in New Orleans and how long people have waited for help there are other towns that were affected but were not able to get aid till Thursday. These people did not riot, they did not kill, they did not rape, they did not complain--they made do, they survived, they did what they could for each other. Perhaps the people complaining should look to their neighbors that had their entire towns destroyed by the Hurricane itself....it's not good anywhere but there are lots of stories of survival out there. It just angers me that all we can think about is New Orleans.....

Seabees Can Do

There is a good section at Navy Newstand showing pictures of our Seabees working in the aftermath of hurricane Katrina....


Gulfport, Miss. (Sept. 3, 2005) – U.S. Navy Seabee,
Constructionman SeamanMichael Jackson, assigned to Naval Mobile Construction Battalion One (NMCB-1),Alpha Company, fills a portable potable water tank for the South Mississippi Kidney Center in North Gulfport, Miss. The center is currently treating more than 300 dialysis patients with the use of emergency generators. The
lifesaving water the Navy is delivering to the center is used for filtering patient's
blood. Without this vital component, patients would be forced to travel to the
next city for treatment. The Navy's involvement in the humanitarian assistance
operations is led by the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), in conjunction
with the Department of Defense. U.S. Navy photo by Photographer'sMate 2nd
Class Michael B. Watkins (RELEASED)

It's great the work they are doing while their own families are living in shelters. Bravo Zulu to our Seabees for showing their "Can Do" attitude in times of need!

Flat Angel

How many people know what a "Flat Stanley" is? Most everyone with kids in school should know! Well hubby has been talking about sending all his stuff home from the sandbox and he said he was going to take me off the wall and pack me up to leave...doesn't that sound funny? Well i got this awesome idea of "Flat Angel"! I am now currently trying to convince him to please take my picture around camp and so I can put it in a scrapbook....we will see if he has the guts to do it or not! I can just see him carrying around a picture of me and taking digital pictures of it! Too bad our daughter didn't have this project this year....he has been to many countries! Flat Piper only got to go to Georgia to visit his dad. Well official word hubby doesn't have much to do tommarrow so "Flat Angel" will be visiting around camp!! WOOHOO!! Can't wait to see the pictures...I told him he had to take a picture that isn't "sexy" so that I can show it to everyone...afraid of which picture he is actually going to use!!

**Update on the Flat Angel project...it is now known as "Flat Angel's USO tour!" LOL I told hubby to make sure that he got a picture of Flat Angel with some of his guys over there and I could call it "Flat Angel Supports the Troops" and he is going to do it! But I have mentioned this to a few hero's I know across the US military and now I am going to get pictures from all over! If you would like to be part of Flat Angel please let me know! I would love to attend your local Protest the Protestors gatherings as well!**

Coming Home!

My husband will be home 4.44 weeks according to his countdown...he's starting to get really done with being over there. It's been over a year now, and as I posted before he had volunteered to stay another 6 months back in April. Of course when he went the first time he pretty much begged to be put on the list that was deploying and when he stayed when everyone else from here came home I supported him so we have been joking about the fact that ONCE AGAIN they are asking for volunteers to stay another 6 month deployment.

He's packing up his footlocker to send it home...he did that once before and then I had to actually send a few things BACK to him because that's when he got his orders to extend finally after they told him he was coming home. I told him he should be excited that he will be home to unpack it this time!

This is our last email conversation about it....

Him: well that sounds like fun i don't have any plans either just sitting
around getting my stuff ready to mail home. Now that sounds good mailing my stuff home lol.

Me: yeah but you have done that once before LOL so we will see if you
actually are here to unpack it LOL just kidding honey :P I know you won't stay again :) Not with your attitude lately LOL you sound like you are done :) i'm starting to get real excited about it though :)

Him: ya me too and your right theres no way i'll stay again. i want to get
back and spend time with you and the kids. i have done my part for now. you can bet i'll have to deploy again some time but not for a couple of years at least lol.

Me: yeah well i bet after a year back home with me and the kids you
will be jumping up and down emailing everyone and their dog again to go if the opportunity arises for anyone to go back LOL And i will shake my head and order more priority mail boxes from the post office when you do LOL

Him: Well i don't know about a year but you are probably right if they are looking for people to come back i will be the one to say i'll go. you know me thats just the way i am but i think i will be taking full advantage of the 2 years that i have before they can call me back!

So that's my hubby and I thought it was nice to share...

Chief Justice Rehnquist

Chief Justice William Rehnquist has passed on. He has helped shape many descisions of the court and his influence has been seen many times.

Toby Keith

Okay honestly I think Toby Keith is a wonderful person that does a lot for the "blue collar" and "camo collar" workers of the USA. He is a man who just lays it out and says Like it or Leave it! I love this song and decided to put it up here even though I had American Soldier on here before. I laugh when I hear this song because I live in Utah and when this song first came out of course the "god loving morman's" who discrimnate against my family, my daughter and my life because I don't go the church decided that it wasn't a good song and wasn't going to allow it on the radio because he said ASS so the radio station did this whole advertisement that they would be playing an "edited version" with the bad word taken out....so I was thinking to myself as I was driving that day "Dammit they caved into "the church" " (as it's known here because you know it's the only church here so we just automatically call it that )*sarcasm is hidden in that sentence can you find it?!?* So it played and i listened...yes here comes the part..... We'll put a *BEEEPP* in your ASS it's the American way! HAHAHAHA I about died laughing!! So everytime I hear this song I laugh and laugh gotta love a country music station!!!

Katrina

Okay I am trying to not post that much about the hurricane I have so many conflicting emotions. Yes I know people that have been directly affected by it, Yes I feel bad for all the people, Yes I wish that people could just magically snap their fingers and all the people there were able to have gotten food and water and medical care immediately but since we dont' live in a disney movie they couldn't. It's sad yes...but what is really sad is all the violence and the mayhem that has erupted...I mean I understand they are hungry "I'm so hungry I could rape someone...." Because that is the first thing I would think of if I was that hungry...hey at least it might take your mind off it right? Or better yet "I'm so pissed because nobody is bringing ME help or food...hey is that a helicopter here trying to drop off supplies or rescue someone?!? OH WELL THEN I think i'm just hungry enough and need help enough that I'm going to shoot at them"

I wish I could do more than what I can...I have offered help here locally as they have just started to bring evacuees here (up to 2,000) of them but I think that activating people (Natl Guard) and get them along with supplies to the site in 2-3 days is actually quite a feat! WAY TO GO !! I mean you can't just fly everyone there...some have to drive otherwise when they get there they won't have vehicles to rescue people...so being a truck driver I know how long it takes to get places...and with the roads washed away and debris strung everywhere making the major inlets into the city unpassable I think they did a good job. They needed time to gather supplies so the rescue workers there dont' become a burden themselves. We dont' want to have to take care of a bunch of aid workers who need food and water themselves. Or god forbid a place to stay...I'm sure they were all being put up in hotels...oh wait no that's right their lives were mirroring the people there as they were working tirelessly everyday they were there to rescue these people for hours and hours everyday.

But DAMN them! for not responding quickly for all those people who couldn't evacuate. Why have we not heard about the other people that were HIT BY THE HURRICANE?!?! Instead of all the people that were affected by the flooding from their levy system? I mean who knew that if you built a city with the water being held back by concrete barriers that were 17-25 feet ABOVE the city that you might have this happen? Hmmm funny we didn't hear about this effort by the LOCAL SEABEES who's base and families were destroyed....but I'm sure it's a Black Thing as many have chosen to say....I'm sorry if I sound bitter but I'm really broken hearted about this but I only wish people themselves would have taken control of themselves...there's no reason that people should have been beaten with pipes, shot, raped etc....I'm done now...I have to stop otherwise I might say more than is needed....

Travel Centers of America

Okay I am a truck driver....not at the moment but at heart and I will be AGAIN in about a month and half when my hubby gets back. So I am used to stopping at truck stops and I have always liked Travel Centers of America or TA's as they will now be known as in this post. Well i have been traveling to my mother's about 150 miles away at least once sometimes twice a week for the last couple of months. My daughter is now living there so I spend most of my time there. I stop at the SAME TA each trip...so sometimes 4 times a week. I get a cup of coffee and I like cream and sugar in my coffee (or as my husband calls it something that is the wrong color...he refuses to call it coffee when you add things to it) well they only have half & half and whole milk in this machine there that doesn't have a temperature gauge on it. Well i have worked food service years ago and that scares me! The first time i got it i ended up dumping it out in the parking lot because it tasted gross and really not right! So i have mentioned this before because there is always this light on the machine like something is wrong with. Of course none of the minimum wage workers there seem to know what this light means....

So I go in tonight as i'm driving home at midnight and buy $45.00 worth of gas....$2.89 a gallon! to get my normal cup of coffee. Well I figure tonight will be different than it was on Monday...they might actually HAVE coffee! Well I still had to tip the big metal pot down to get anything out so apparently they are ALMOST out of coffee. But of course they have NO sugar... and still that nasty cream! So i pay $3.50 for a small container of coffee mate that I could get for a $1.00 elsewhere (You want to talk about price gouging go into a truck stop and try to buy hygeine products or food) and I say to the guy "You are out of coffee" he says "Hmm that's too bad" <----huh?!? You are a truck stop you retard...coffee is as important as diesel! So then I tell him "You are out of sugar as well" he says "Yeah I know" <---oh so i'm not the first one that has mentioned this....Then i ask him if maybe the TA has considered offering a non dairy creamer for those that are lactose intolerant or prefer not to use scarey cream out of a machine....."If you offered a powder cream then I wouldnt' have to pay 3.50 for this little jar to keep in my truck when I stop here 2-4 times a week for coffee. What would the drivers do if they are lactose intolerant and maybe it might be something to think about" he says..." Well i guess if they don't like cream then they should learn to drink their coffee black" Oh you are shitting me right??!?!? So needless to say I had to walk to the restaurant to get sugar for my coffee, took my $3.50 creamer out to my truck and began to form the letter of complaint to the company. It isn't that they don't carry creamer I feel safe using it's that his customer service skills SUCK! I'm sorry but I'm giving that much money to fill up my pickup truck and I'm paying for my coffee and he acts like he's not there to do something for the customer's...I'm sorry that's why they pay you! Well i guarantee when I begin filling up 200 gallons of fuel at $3.00 a gallon....I'll be driving an extra 30 miles to get fuel at the Flying J.

The Family

Me and my beatiful daughter! I keep her locked in the basement and that is why she isn't as tan as I am...I swear!! I DO NOT PAY for mine!!



This is my hubby...what a sexy man :) Course he's not normally so mean looking...but when it's 130 degrees outside you might have that look on your face as well!!